Many men have been running away from marriages simply because of dowry payment which is a very expensive affair.
Some men have resorted the informal 'come we stay' marriages and others have preferred bachelorhood.
The Kalenjin community has not been an exception in dowry payment. People who have married from the community have testified how the inlaws have pinned them down to pay a certain amount of dowry.
Since the times of our forefathers', dowry in Kalenjin community has been in form of cows, sheep and goats until recently where money has been introduced in addition to cattle.
It is during 'Koito' (farewell ceremony) that dowry negotiations are done in the Kalenjin community.
The couples' parents, their uncles and aunts converge in a room where negotiations are done. The bride and groom are not part of the negotiations and are not allowed to contribute to the talks.
Robert Muturi, married to a Kalenjin lady said dowry is a way that in-laws exploit you by setting the dowry too expensive which might take you a lifetime to clear.
"During my dowry negotiation in my farewell in Kaptarai village in Uasin Gishu county, I was asked to pay 12 cows, 4 sheep and Sh100,000."
"After a long negotiation, the bar was set, which was 6 cows, 4 sheep and Sh50,000, which is still very expensive," lamented Muturi.
In Kalenjin community, the level of education and the job of the lady is considered in setting the dowry. It is believed an education will be an asset to you and will contribute a lot to the growth of your family.
"Although I have a higher education than my wife, the in-laws still wanted to exploit me. I stood the ground and after seemingly a never-ending negotiation, a dowry of 4 cows and 2 sheep was set," said Jacob Tuimor, a resident of Sogomo, on the outskirts of Eldoret town.
"The dowry I paid is the minimum, I really applaud my negotiators for good interventions," he added.
"Men should not complain when it comes to dowry because it is just a token of appreciation to our parents for raising us well for them to marry us," said Tuimors' wife.
The dowry in Maasai and Kikuyu community is regarded the very expensive in Kenya. Some grooms' have been asked to part ways with up to 50 cows or over Sh1 million in these communities.
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