Relationships are no joke, they take mental strength, emotional resilience, and physical intimacy just to make them function optimally. You would think that would make breakups less easy. You wouldn't be more wrong about that, breakups are also one hectic and bumpy road, full of varying and contradicting emotions. However, like everything worth doing, you should be able to get it done and move on to the next phase of your dating life emotionally healthier, stronger and wiser.
After the breakup life never seems to be quite the same as before, you’ll feel lonely, lost, and just not yourself for quite some time. This happens even to the best of us, especially if the relationship really meant something or we were totally immersed in love juice with our partners. However, this does not offer an excuse to let go of yourself by wallowing in self-pity and embracing coping mechanisms that ensure self-destruction.
Moving on is a long process, at-least for genuine people, it doesn't just happen overnight. Emotional wounds need time to completely heal (if they even actually do heal). Here are some very effective tips on how to move on from a relationship:
#1 Allow for time to heal
It takes a while to work toward getting over a relationship you were so invested in, some days will definitely be harder than others but you have to accept the simple fact that life is not going to be exactly normal for the next few days or months- depending on who you are and what the relationship meant to you. So, brace yourself for this rough patch.
#2 Choose easy and healthy
Breakups are simply put, quite messy. None of the partners is in their right state of mind during this period since emotions such as rage, resentment and hate tend to cloud their judgment. You first have to realize that there's a wrong way of doing things before you can set out to find the right way. Always choose an emotionally healthy and easy split.
#3 Feel your feelings
Burying pain in the deepest, darkest and furthest depths of your heart and being is definitely not the best option for handling the feelings that accompany a breakup. This will only let the anger brew to an alarming level and is generally unhealthy behavior. Allow yourself to feel the pain, live through every felt emotion. It's okay to cry and feel crappy, you're only human after all!
#4 Avoid rebound sex
In the heat of things, getting under someone else might seem like a pretty good idea to deal with your feelings of betrayal and self-loathing. It might even make you feel like you're reclaiming your lost power and reassert yourself, pumping with grit and unfazed by the breakup. But this phase will pass and you will eventually have to face those breakup demons.
#5 Open up to a confidant
They say that a problem shared is a problem half solved. This stands true for breakups, once you share your story and seek support and guidance from your friends then you find the courage to face the world renewed. Good friends will inspire and encourage you to get back on the horse cause breakups are part of dating and life in general.
#6 Out of sight out of mind
Getting over someone while you are still in constant contact with them is pretty hard. Stop stalking them on social media and hanging out in his/her favorite joints, this will just make the whole process of moving on unbearable. Get as far away from your ex as possible.
#7 Work on yourself
You're used to doing things as a couple for so long that you've even forgotten how to take care of yourself and treat yourself to the finer trimmings of life? This offers an opportunity to rekindle Self Love. Set personal goals either work-related or milestones to do with physical exercise. Think positively and focus on relaxing techniques that’ll help you get rid of negativity, this will put you on a healthy path of moving on.
#8 Assess your previous relationship
When you're finally in a good place to get back on the dating horse, you can look back into your previous relationship with a critically analytical view. Weigh the pros and cons, and find out what mistakes were made and learn from them. Go into the next relationship with your head reared a little upper cause you are a survivor who has learned and conquered!