Perhaps your birth was not as remarkable as this toddler’s, that’s why you are bogged by the incessant need to celebrate it every year. Its grandfather chose to knight himself.
It was not an achievement worth celebrating owing to the circumstances surrounding the birth of the child – the daughter is barely into her teens (a class seven pupil) – but Mzee arap Kulei saw it fit to join the ranks of those people with ‘sir’ preceding their names.
He has been heard going about the village exhorting people to call him Sir Guka, despite the fact that he is a deadbeat cockerel. The middle-aged man loves the bottle more than he loves life.
A source close to the family intimated that the Sir Guka had been constantly harassing the said daughter, telling her that she had reached the age in which she can entertain men.
As opposed to other girls, she grew quickly in terms of physique, leading to the old man’s taunts especially when he is drunk.
Sure enough, the girl took heed to her father’s insults and got pregnant in the process. She gave birth and her father now is a village knight, a self-styled way to celebrate failed parenting.
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