Domestic violence is not physical violence alone. Domestic violence is any behavior the purpose of which is to gain power and control over a spouse, partner, girl/boyfriend or intimate family member.
This kind of abuse can happen to anyone, yet the problem is often overlooked, excused, or denied. This is especially true when the abuse is psychological, rather than physical. There are many types of domestic violence, including social, physical, sexual, spiritual and emotional.
Here are some of the signs that you're in an abusive relationship:
1. Fear of your partner
This the most telling sign that you're in an abusive relationship. If you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around your partner, constantly watching what you say and do in order to avoid a blow-up or altercation then chances are your relationship is unhealthy and abusive.
2. Your partner belittles you or tries to control you
Controlling behavior is a way for the batterer to maintain his dominance over the victim. Controlling behavior, the belief that he is justified in the controlling behavior, and the resultant abuse is the core issue in abuse of women
3. Feel like you can't do anything right by your partner
When your partner constantly faults your choices like not allowing you freedom of choice in terms of clothing styles, makeup or hairstyle.
This is a sign of abuse, which may include forcing you to dress more seductively or more conservatively than you're comfortable.
4. Jealousy and possessiveness
When your partner has the habit of calling or coming home unexpectedly to check up on you. This may initially start as what appears to be a loving gesture, but becomes a sign of jealousy or possessiveness. This could lead to an abusive relationship.
5. He keeps you socially isolated
Isolation is a form of abuse often closely connected to controlling behaviors. It is not an isolated behavior, but the outcome of many kinds of abusive behaviors.
If your partner keeps you from seeing who you want to see and doing what you want to do then this is an abusive trend. If he's setting and meeting goals, and controlling how you think and feel, he is strategically isolating you from the resources which may help you leave the relationship.
He keeps you away from having contact with the world which might not reinforce his perceptions and beliefs
6 Feeling emotionally numb or helpless
Does your partner criticize you and put you down? Treat you so badly that you’re embarrassed for your friends or family to see? ignore or put down your opinions or accomplishments? Blame you for their own abusive behavior? Does he see you as property or a sex object, rather than as a person? All these could be relevant questions that would go along way to prove that you're actually a victim of an abusive relationship
7. You have constant feelings of self loathing and desperation
If your partner has the habit of forcing or encouraging your dependency by making you believe that you're simply incapable of surviving or performing simple tasks without them being by your side, then this could be a sign of emotional abuse.
8 Constantly ignores your desire not to have sex
If your partner constantly uses force, coercion, guilt, or manipulation when making sexual advances and never considers your desire not to have sex.
Then this is a sure sign of sexual abuse, this may include making you have sex with others, have unwanted sexual experiences, or be involuntarily involved in prostitution.
9 Believe that you deserve to be hurt and mistreated
Finally, after a series of battery and abuse the victim tends to feel like they actually deserve the horror being meted upon them by their spouses. This is a sign that the abuse has been existent for quite a long period of time.
If you find yourself suffering from any of the aforementioned signs, yet not limited to only these, you should report the incidences and seek out help to manage the crisis before it's too late.
Only through the elimination of sexism, the end of cultural supports for violence, and the adoption of a system of beliefs and values embracing equality and mutuality in intimate relationships will end men’s violence against women.