I have been keenly following the debate that the very public and acrimonious implosion of Lilian Muli's short-lived marriage has triggered.
Lilian Muli is not the first woman to suffer the fate of two broken relationships.
Let me tell you the story of Ariana Grande, the internationally renowned American pop star known for a sugary voice and a compelling string of hits before I make my points on this issue.
Ariana was in a two-year committed relationship with rapper Mac Miller.
But early this year that relationship came to an acrimonious end over what she called her 'man's toxic substance abuse.'
Mac Miller would later die of an overdose. Even before the dust of that break-up could settle, she got into another relationship, this time with Pete Davidson, a prime time comedian. As fate would have it, that second relationship imploded just like the first.
The pop star says that this year has been the toughest given what she has been through, two break-ups in a year.
In the wake of that second break-up, she plunged into Post Traumatic Disorder. In her latest single, 'Thank You' she, with moving emotional acuity, chronicles that indescribable trauma.
People get out of relationships for a bewildering array of reasons and it is never an easy decision to make which is why I am angry at the misogynistic trajectory the Lilian Muli debate has taken.
The slut-shaming of a woman, who's nursing serious emotional wounds and in need of urgent psycho-social help, by men with sisters and daughters is shocking.
Most of the men lashing out at her, in my estimation, are doing so out of a misplaced notion of her hatred for men or just for fun while the women doing so are doing so because the Jared guy is from their tribe or they are just jealous of the incredible success that Lilian has achieved.
I say this because, in my analysis and considered view, the social media excoriation of Muli lacks an iota of context.
Folks are just hitting out at her without first taking a pause to consider the facts.
If you have been in a relationship that broke up and had to battle the trauma and still bear the emotional scars, you know better than to join the blood-thirsty, sanctimonious bandwagon of social media rottweilers. Shame on them!
#hivisasaoriginal