The reception of the cheap lodging at Maili Sita. [Photo: Scoopdesk]
When you walk into this guest house in one of Nakuru's outskirts, things look just fine.
As you enter, there is ample parking, a butchery at the entrance and within the several open cubicles is a woman having a drink with a young man.
The woman, who is overweight, seems much older but wealthy.
Her ring finger says she is taken. The young man must be a carpenter, he has a hammer. Or maybe he is what Fiona Kerry talks of in her lyrics, I need a carpenter to fix my front door!
We quickly go upstairs to the reception.
Here, a young cutie hangs loosely on a stool, that which they call sina taabu in our local dingy pubs. Do you know a sina taabu? ask and you will be shown, haha!
She looks fine, nice figure, cute looks and often wears a naive smile. The kind of a smile satan would wear if he saw Jesus pass by.
She is the kind you cannot be shocked if you happen to wake up next to her after a night in the Garden of Eden.
A colleague of her, a relatively old woman joins her.
She has lost several teeth and has a broken lip.
Guys, this is the cheapest lodging in this town which is popular with nightlife - loosing a tooth or breaking a lip must be nothing here!
And Trump would call it what it is; a shithole lodging.
Located at the famous Maili Sita, which locals have dubbed Sita, the house is the hub for cheap sex, cheap booze, cheap sleep and cheap everything.
To spend a night here, you need just a hundred bob. Yeah, one hundreeed shiliiings oonly!
If you happen to be among the rich men and you have to yourself Sh200, then you will have a bed and a flesh peddler!
We couldn't believe this and decided to sample the rooms they offer for this amount.
The old woman, still with missing teeth and a broken lip offered to show us around.
"Si mtaninunulia kanusu," she burst out with heavy accent as we cruised up the dark stairs.
Her mouth reeks of a concotion of cheap drinks.
Old, dirty women parade their silicon butts along the rooms where they offer quickies to thirsty drunks.
"Unataka mmoja? Ni mia mia," our old woman said.
When you look at the women, you understand why man is an animal!
Amina, who lives in a nearby rental house, regalled us with stories of how hookers always fight with clients as many are drunks who fail to pay after services.
So next time you are in Nakuru, ask around and pay this place a visit, your Sh2000 will give you 10 nights and 10 women!