A stressed woman[photo/weddingserviceskenya.com]In the last few weeks, spouses have taken the ‘till death do us part’ vow literally in their hands. Recently, we’ve had three or more cases where in one case a husband tricked his wife into his house and burnt her alive. She was rescued but had over 60 per cent burns.
Days later, she breathed her last in hospital. Just the other day a man murdered his wife and three children before dousing himself and burning their house in Juja. Another 32-year-old man murdered his two children at Kiganjo estate in Thika town and then attempted to kill himself.
One woman had raised concern about issues in her marriage to a friend. And the friend promised that they would meet and PRAY about it. Yes, PRAY. Few weeks before, according to a relative, the PASTOR had come to solve some issues and reconciled them.
And this is where they’ll say, marriage is not easy, ni kuvumilia tuu. To ‘knock’ some more sense, they’ll quote some Bible verse that says, ‘A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands’.
They’ll challenge the woman, usiwe mjinga, jenga nyumba yako. Then she’s embarrassed and empowered (somehow) to go back to jenga her home. Only for the husband to tear it, this time with everyone including the children inside.
Yes, pray, pray and pray. But in the face of violence, walk away and pray on your way out.
Let no prayer partner or pastor make you believe otherwise. Ati vumila tuu, for how long, exactly? Just how many more cases are expected to serve as a wake-up call if the cases so far aren’t enough? Fine, women have a choice to take or dismiss a pastor’s advice, but a vulnerable woman is fragile and because the church offers ‘safe refuge’, any advice from there is sound advice. She can’t be blamed!
It’s about time religious outfits and the church built their own homes and set up measures to deal with domestic violence.