Choosing a life partner is a big decision and not one to take lightly. When choosing a man to marry, ask yourself lots of questions and evaluate what you want. Know your own role and responsibilities in creating a happy relationship and recognize that it’s up to you to create the relationship you want.
Feel comfortable in who you are and make efforts to share each other’s families. Talk about your differences and any potential problems that may arise if you do become married.
Don’t confuse an “emotional roller coaster” with being crazy about someone
When someone isn’t fully emotionally available to us or we don’t know where they stand, it creates a type of anxiety. The anxiety has a way of taking over our brains to the point where our thoughts are all consumed by this person. We’re constantly thinking about where they are and what they are doing. Before we know it, we start planning our lives around them.
Find someone you can be yourself around
This may sound cliched but it’s true. Picking a partner where you feel like you can be 100 percent yourself with no judgment and complete acceptance is a wonderful and liberating feeling. In life it can be difficult to find venues where you can truly be yourself. A relationship should be your safe and comfortable place where you don’t have to keep a mask on.
Don’t let lust be your guide
People have a tendency to put up with a lot of crap from someone they are dating when they feel a magnetic chemistry with them. Magnetic chemistry has a strong power because it isn’t something that happens often. When we find someone we have magnetic chemistry with, not only is it an aphrodisiac that we can’t get enough of but we also confuse it with the right person (e.g., “this must be right if I feel this strongly!”). Magnetic chemistry is great but doesn’t excuse bad behavior because of it.
Throw out your checklist
Many people have extensive lists of what qualities and traits their ideal partner has to have. If you box yourself into a checklist you may miss out on some great matches for you. It’s almost impossible to find a perfect checklist partner, and when we think we have found it we throw all caution to the wind and disregard some not so desirable qualities. A great relationship has emotional compatibility. How does the person make you feel as opposed to what does this person look like on paper?
Don’t make choices out of fear
So many times people either choose a partner or stay with someone in an unhappy relationship predominantly out of some kind of fear. Usually, that fear is being alone but fears can vary widely from person to person. It’s often better to be alone and wait for the right person than to make a decision out of fear. Making decisions out of fear leads to confusion, anxiety and a general feeling of something being amiss.