It's not the most comfortable of conversations, but if you've been given a positive result from a sexual health check, you'll need to tell any sexual partners — past, present, and future, so they can go and get themselves tested. It's natural to feel worried, but ultimately it's a chat you need to have.The following are steps to tell someone you have an STI:
1. Get on top of your own health. If your STI tests come back positive, the first thing you should do is to get yourself treated. Luckily most STIs are treatable, and it's best that treatment is started as soon as possible. For those infections that stay in your body (HIV, genital warts), there is medication available to reduce the symptoms and help you manage the condition. Starting treatment will help you feel calmer and more in control of the situation, which will only help when you go to break the news.
2. Be prepared to offer information. Before you tell someone that they might have an STI, inform yourself about the infection: know the symptoms, and how it is transmitted and any treatment options. The person is likely to press you for information and it's good to have some knowledge so you can reassure them.
3. Try to make it as personal as possible. Broadly speaking if you have a long-term partner it is good to tell them face-to-face. With someone who isn't a regular partner or someone you've had one-off contact with.
4. Pick the right moment.Choose a time to tell them when you're calm and feel in control. And try to tell them when they are likely to feel the same.
5. Be direct. It's understandable that the other person may automatically start blaming you, but try not to get into a blaming conversation about who gave whom the infection, partly because it's hard to know where the original infection came from. Try and stay as calm as possible and focus on the main details of them getting tested.
6. Follow up. If you have a relationship with the person or they're your regular partner, it's good to ask them if they went to get checked.
7. If you can't do face-to-face, call or text.f, for whatever reason, you're reluctant to tell them yourself, many clinics have a sexual health advisor who can do it for you. There is an option for the clinic to do it anonymously without mentioning you.