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We've heard that you shouldn't yell at your spouse unless the house is on fire. Putting aside yelling for normal reasons like sports and surprises, how does yelling affect your communication with your spouse? Words are powerful but the tone of delivery yields even greater power.
Yelling tends to denote hostility, anger or an attempt to take control by being loud. You might be convinced that the louder you are, the better you'll be heard. That is miles from the truth.
Communication is about determining how the other party will best understand your point of view. First, appreciate the context. Are both of you angry? Is any of you tired? How is the mood? Then, you can structure yur opinion suitably.
One of the saddest realities of yelling, is how quickly it shifts the point of focus. Instead of discussing the issue at hand, it turns into a word match. A 'who can rap the "baddest" words at the fastest speed.'
Remaining calm is the easiest hard thing to do. Setting aside pride and ego is vital for communication. No one likes being yelled at. They will attack or defend themselves ferociously. It will bar communication.
Try using a lower tone today. Add a soft touch to your voice and see how it transforms your communication game.